


still

by kornevable



Category: Fire Emblem: Fuukasetsugetsu | Fire Emblem: Three Houses
Genre: M/M, Post-Time Skip, Roleswap
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-02-15
Updated: 2021-02-15
Packaged: 2021-03-17 16:00:57
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 759
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29474382
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/kornevable/pseuds/kornevable
Summary: “Am I an even more disgusting sight now, Dimitri?” Felix asks. “You finally deign speaking to me, when I’m at my lowest. Is it the sight you’ve pretended to warn me against?”This isn't what Dimitri wanted. / Day 2 of Dimilix week: roleswap AU
Relationships: Dimitri Alexandre Blaiddyd/Felix Hugo Fraldarius
Comments: 2
Kudos: 33
Collections: 2021 Dimilix Week





	still

**Author's Note:**

> Hellooo I love roleswap AU and I love regrets. :)

Sylvain claps him on the back and Ingrid squeezes his shoulder, before they both leave him alone in the cathedral. Dimitri doesn’t understand why, since his words have never been able to reach their intended target. He stares at the form of the man whose bestiality shines even under the dimmest light, pacing the length of the nave like a caged animal. It’s not too far from the truth.

Felix refuses to listen to reason. He snarls at anyone suggesting they reroute towards Fhirdiad, snaps at every gesture of kindness and isolates himself to murmur promises of vengeance. For the first time since the Western Rebellion, Dimitri is truly terrified. He doesn’t know who this person is anymore.

The dormant beast within the crown prince of Faerghus bares his teeth for everyone to see, like he’s trying to prove nothing intimidates him.

“You weren’t supposed to…,” Dimitri trails off, unable to turn the sand in his mouth into proper words.

Felix stops pacing and jerks his head towards Dimitri. His eyes are narrowed and his jaw is tense, his entire posture stiff with anger that he’s carried with him since he came back bloody and haunted and brotherless from the battlefield of Duscur.

Absurdly, Dimitri’s eyes are drawn to Felix’s much longer hair now, unkempt and neglected—he wants to card his fingers through it, like he did when they were children.

“Am I an even more disgusting sight now, Dimitri?” Felix asks. “You finally deign speaking to me, when I’m at my lowest. Is it the sight you’ve pretended to warn me against?”

Warnings of a beast waiting to be awakened, of rage so hot it would burst and take down with it the soul in which it is rotting. Dimitri kept thinking all these negative emotions would strip Felix of his humanity.

Dimitri didn’t mean it. Not like this. He simply wanted to get back the Felix he knew.

“I didn’t want you to become like this,” he whispers.

Felix snorts. “So your solution was to avoid me most of the time, and to speak to me only when you thought my behavior was out of line. Are you going to keep doing it?”

Felix is shorter than him, but his presence has always been grander. Each one of his word is as sharp as his sword and cuts deep into anyone listening to them. He holds his head high, his chin tilted upwards and his gaze defiant, as though he is containing the world’s anger within his body. He stands and speaks like the king he’s been raised to become, but he acts and thinks like the warrior he’s dreamed to be.

Maybe this is why the beast was able to take refuge in Felix’s body—everything Felix wants, from a good fight to respect as a soldier, the beast will be able to bring it to him. Dimitri feels nauseous.

“It’s not too late to change your mind and save Fhirdiad first,” Dimitri pleads. “I know you’re not a ravenous creature craving for carnage.”

“And yet here I am, hands full of blood,” Felix snaps. “You kept saying I wasn’t being myself. What if this is my true nature? Are you still willing to become the Lance standing at my right, like you promised to when we were children?”

Felix takes a step forward, but Dimitri doesn’t move. He’s looking at these golden eyes mad with grief, sparkling with hatred that Felix himself doesn’t seem to comprehend. Dimitri was supposed to be there for him to handle his outbursts of emotion—Felix was someone who felt too much, too strongly, and Dimitri left him alone festering in blind fury because he didn’t know what to do to lessen his pain.

“I’m sorry, Felix.” His voice breaks on each syllable of Felix’s name, after being trapped for years in his throat. “I want to help you, but please, you have to let me. You can’t continue like this.”

Felix shakes his head, the corner of his mouth lifted in a travesty of a grin.

“Of course. Typical of you. You backtrack as soon as you realize you’ve made a mistake. It’s too late for regrets.”

Felix brushes past him, leaving behind a flurry of teal and white, and retreats into a corner of the cathedral. More strands of his hair fall out of his messy ponytail in his stomping, and Dimitri can only watch in defeat, like he always did.

But this is Felix, even in this state of madness. Dimitri is still there, despite everything.

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks for reading, kudos and comments always appreciated!
> 
> / [twitter](https://twitter.com/kornetable)


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